Just had my dinner with my family. It has been a long time ever since we've had a meal as a family. We headed down to some coffee shop and ordered a few dishes and ate. It wasn't anything fancy, but it definitely had brought back many, many memories about the past.

I came to know about my family's financial status when I'm always being turned down from buying souvenirs at events and eating out at coffee shops while other families get to eat out at an actual restaurant and living a fanciful life. I'm constantly jealous of what others have and I don't. Honestly, I did grumble a lot about how my family is not as fortunate as others and how I wished my childhood is just like my peers with stories to talk about and memories to look back at.

I've always had a dream; to be treated like a princess and lead a fancy life. Every single day ive always thought to myself how life would be like if Im rich. I would also like to pretend that im a princess by wearing dresses and address myself as princess yap when I was young. Till this very day, I've never stopped fantasizing about how I would live in a big house with invitations to parties every day. I don't know why I want to make each and everyday so special and fun, maybe its because I want to fill up those unfulfilled desires from my childhood that I never got to have.

I think that god has heard my desperate cry for the past 17 years of my life and finally gave me a boy that treats me right; and not just right - like a royalty. Of course im not talking about asking him to carry all of my stuffs wherever we go and wear my shoe for me that kind of extent, but those little gestures that actually makes me feel appreciated, and loved. Sure he can be a little annoying at times(who doesn't) and pretty much have a temper of a three year old, but he definitely knows how to make me feel special. How? What kind of boy would run down in the pouring rain and get me a meal from macdonalds just because I haven't ate my dinner in the middle of the night, answer my phone at 3am in the morning only to get shouted at just because I was frustrated but forgave me the very nexr day, writes 52 reasons why he loves me on poker cards and flim a video overnight for his love for valentine's, carry my bag for me when im feeling like a lazy pig, pays for my expenses, drops cheesy lines each and everyday just to put a smile on my face, sends me home everytime we go out without hesitant? Im feeling like a princess living her dream of having her prince charming by her side.

Now back to my point, the only thing that its left unfulfilled is having a fancy life. I guess this is where I get my motivation for working so hard; I refuse to settle for anything lesser than a fancy life and I will not stop until I get to my goal. I love having a room that is designed by myself, eating out at restaurants, going to concerts, parties, social events, anything that makes my life seems so special.

I love my family for everything; for giving my protection, for giving me love and care, for teaching me from right and wrong and the adequate freedom that I need as a 17 year old, but I cant help but to dream bigger, want more.

Maybe im just a weird, ambitious girl after all.
I just wish my life can be more eventful.